Katherine Perumal

In Memoriam 21 October 1946 - 13 April 2006

+++++++++++++++++++++++

I thought maybe today,

Was the when,

I wouldn't count anymore,

And forgot the years,

As pain’s old paramour...

The world moves on,

Love and Lives,

Both don’t seem to matter,

I thought it was today,

Yet still, You are holding me together,

I saw You in a kid,

And in another, my Father,

I hope,

Ya’ll up there,

Are sharing in the laughter,

This day, Ma,

Is always harder then the others,

There’s much less love in the world,

And now I worry as a father,

Waltz in their dreams Ma,

As You live in mine,

Know I love you always,

And You are my Divine…

+++++++++++++++++++++++

GJP - 13 April 2024

Katherine Perumal

 In Memoriam 21 October 1946 - 13 April 2006

++++++++++++++++

As I reflect on another year past,

I can’t believe what I’ve seen,

The party up there is raging larger,

As threads here unravel at their seams,

As I pen this missive down,

I once again feel shattered,

Pain has become a constant of life,

And it’s often hard to see what matters,

But I hold myself together,

Knowing I live in your light,

In the laughter of a little boy,

Your smile is never out of sight,

I miss you now more than ever,

You always knew what to say,

When things looked their hardest,

Your quiet strength found a way,

From your place, in the universe,

I pray you watch over us,

Guide and strengthen my soul,

As I welcome another Son’s opus…

++++++++++++++++

 In Memoriam 21 October 1946 - 13 April 2006

++++++++++++++++

This familiar time of year,

Again I’ve lost more than before,

Love; Appa and our unborn,

The count of angels continue to grow,

That great gig in the sky,

The party up there is growing bigger,

16 years since have now passed,

The world seems far more somber,

Yet as you always reminded me,

Life’s joys are always abound,

You just gotta know where to look,

And turn to follow the sound,

And that’s this little boy,

Who continues to bless me,

With his laughter and mischief,

He never fails to melt me,

In him, I see how you’ve loved me,

How you must’ve felt around me,

A daily reminder of your life,

And that your love is always with me…

+++++++++++++++

Silhouette

 

Silhouette

++++++++++++++++++++

The Night enveloped him,

The Devil beckoned with glee.

Darkness held his hand,

Among his old friends,

His tears flowed free,

Theirs weren't shoulders to cry on,

Together, they mocked his naivety,

Oh you fool, they laughed,

Making light of his pride,

And stripping his dignity,

What choice did he have,

But to accept his tragic comedy,

He placed his hand on his chest,

Wondering why it was heavy,

When it was without a heart, Empty,

His old friends laughed,

Happy at the reunited Quartet,

Come with us they called,

There is nothing for you out there,

So he followed, a forgotten silhouette...

++++++++++++++++++++

Rainbow in the Night

Rainbow in the Night

++++++++++++++++++++

The sun shifted its gaze,

Onto a hopeless world,

I thought I'd see you again,

And then I heard your words,

The thought of losing you,

Had never crossed my mind,

You were always my light,

My rainbow in the night,

I felt my heart break,

My will had finally gone,

My world gave in,

This time, The pain had won,

And then out of nowhere,

Your voice it pierced the void,

You still shined your light,

My rainbow in the night,

Long ago, you came to me,

When I forgot I knew love,

I forgot I knew how to love,

You gave me happiness,

I now know, I never deserved,

When the time comes,

For me to land this flight,

I hope you'll again turn your light on me,

My Rainbow in the Night...

++++++++++++++++++++

My Sun

  

My Sun

++++++++++++++++++++

A shadow hung,

Behind your gaze,

The sun couldn't smile,

Love forgot its' days...

Then you turned your head,

The fire of your eyes,

This dying planet,

Found its life in disguise...

Your face hidden in light,

A galaxy's forgotton glow,

A tenet that light mirrors,

The river from which life flows...

I am but desperate stillness,

You know my heart's weakness,

I can't venture forth,

Without your love and forgiveness....

I love you, My Princess,

You are my guiding star,

Mothering a child you never chose,

My life, that I love from afar....

++++++++++++++++++++

Faraway Angel

 

Faraway Angel

++++++++++++++++++++

Did She walk, did She Float,

An Angel's gait She totes,

He watched,

As another's arm, She circled,

His gaze, from afar,

Like a world from it's star,

He watched,

Her stolen laughs and giggles,

Hid, behind the rustle of leaves,

Under the shadows of the trees,

He watched,

As their lives, entangled,

She forgot he was there,

That his promise was to care,

He watched,

As his time, was strangled,

Hope, he carried and paid its fare,

But alas, She was not there,

He watched,

As with time, his memory, She stifled,

Soon he faded with her whim,

His soul, left with the wind,

He watched,

As the last sunset, faded over the hill...

++++++++++++++++++++

Katherine...

++++++++++++++++

Mom it’s another year

I don’t know how I got here,

But another one is gone,

And I can’t shake off this fear,

You gained a Grandson,

And Lord know’s he’s so fine,

I can’t begin to imagine,

A time before he was mine,

So many have gone,

We know that’s the price of time,

But life renews itself,

And that’s my faith and lifeline,

I wish you could see him,

And bounce him on your knee,

I see your love in his eyes,

And your laughter in his glee,

Yet it’s not all roses,

You know that’s life’s fee,

I wish I didn’t have the responsibility,

To bury all that’s dear to me,

Till we meet again ma,

When, I cannot be certain,

In all this pain and turmoil,

You are my only constant,

I don’t know what I’ll say ma,

If next year comes around,

Please help and guide us,

So we can all sleep sound.

+++++++++++++++

In Memoriam, Katherine Perumal

21 October 1946 - 13 April 2006

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

It’s been 14yrs of silence,

A world without your cadence,

I haven’t stopped missing you,

Or learning your life’s lessons,

This year feels a little different,

A new life has come our way,

A blessing I feared I’d never have,

Before I ended my own stay,

He’s a real joy ma,

A chip off the ol’ block I’d say,

A chubby, curious, cheeky boy,

Who always brightens my day,

I love it when he gazes around,

And I catch him smiling into space,

It’s when I am sure you are closest ma,

As his Angel, caressing his face,

I’ll never forget you ma,

And I’ll teach him about you too,

But I know you’re way ahead of me,

As the Angel to whom he coos...

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

In Memoriam, Katherine Perumal, 21 October 1946 - 13 April 2006

In Memoriam...

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 

Another turn of the calendar, 

I’ve not returned to these pages, 

I forgot I owned these words, 

Chafed by life’s starched edges,

Spring has come by again, 

On its winds a familiar susurrus, 

A pain that’s never left my heart, 

On its broken surface, a naevus,

It’s the 13th of April, 

13 Years from that day, 

A lot has come to pass since then, 

But your love will never be carried away,

I relive the smallest memories, 

Your life’s song preserved in mine, 

I see Your sacrifices sonorously, 

Awed by the mountains You climbed, 

I love You ma, 

I know You needed the rest, 

I miss You ad infinitum, 

Your words, when I’m not at my best,

I know You watch over us,

Loving and caring was always Your way, 

Turn Your eyes to them that need You, 

For now, that’s all I Pray…

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

- Ganesh J. Perumal